Escaping the Rat Race Without Running Faster
Why earning more won't set you free, and what actually will.
You’re making good money. Shit, maybe even mid-six figures! The kind of salary that once seemed impossible. The number you dreamed about when you were just getting started, yet somehow, your bank account tells a different story.
There’s never quite enough left over at the end of the month. Every raise you get seems to evaporate into thin air. Every bonus check disappears before you’ve had time to appreciate it. It gets swallowed up by bills, debt payments, or that one necessary purchase that somehow became urgent.
You find yourself working harder than ever before.
Longer hours, more responsibilities, and more stress. And despite all this effort, you’re not getting ahead. It feels like you’re running on a treadmill, but the scenery never changes.
You’re tired and you’re not moving forward. That’s the rat race, and it’s absolutely exhausting.
My Story: Chasing the Next Thing
I’ve watched this pattern play out countless times, both in my own life and in the lives of the business owners and executives I advise as a CFO. Early in my career, I fell into the same trap most ambitious people do.
I genuinely believed that the next milestone would be the one that finally changed everything!
The next promotion would give me breathing room. The next raise would be the one that put me ahead for good. The next bonus would finally let me catch up and start building real wealth.
But here’s what actually happened. My expenses grew just as fast as my income.
I experienced Lifestyle Creep
It’s totally a thing, and you’re not alone if you’ve experienced the same!
A new salary meant a nicer condo.
A larger bonus meant a newer car.
More responsibility meant more expensive clothes and shoes…
More dinners out and more of the lifestyle that seemed to come with the territory.
I was making more money than I had ever imagined, but I wasn’t any more financially secure than I’d been years before while making less.
I learned the reality of lifestyle creep through experience, and I learned that escaping the rat race isn’t about earning more money so you can spend more. It’s about something fundamentally different.
It’s about shifting your entire approach from chasing future goals to setting standards that define who you are right now.
Once I made that shift, everything changed.
How I handled money, approached my financial house, and how I thought about building wealth over time. Not overnight, but steadily in a way that sticks long term.
What Actually Works: A Different Framework
Consumption Goals vs. Identity Standards
Most financial advice focuses on goals.
I want to save $20K this year
I want to increase my salary 5% by next year
I want to pay off my credit card debt by December
Here’s the problem with goals.
They keep you perpetually focused on some future version of yourself. You’re always reaching for something you don’t have yet, always falling short of where you think you should be, and even when you hit the goal, the satisfaction is temporary.
You check the box, maybe even celebrate for a day, and then you’re back to square one → looking for the next mountain to climb.
Standards work differently. Standards are declarations about who you are right now, in the present moment.
Instead of “I want to save $20K this year,” the standard is “I save 10% of my paycheck automatically.”
Instead of “I want to increase my salary by 5% by next year,” the standard is “I provide value wherever I work and am paid a premium.”
Instead of “I want to pay off my credit card debt by December”, the standard is “I don’t carry credit card balances and pay them in full every month.”
See the difference?
One is chasing a future destination. The other is claiming a current identity.
Your identity drives your decisions, and your decisions create your outcomes.
When saving money is a goal you’re trying to reach, it’s always optional, always negotiable, and always can be put off until tomorrow.
But when not carrying credit card debt is simply part of your identity, the decision to avoid unnecessary purchases becomes automatic.
You don’t have to rely on willpower or motivation. You’re just being consistent with who you’ve decided to be.
Defense vs. Offense: You Need Both
As a former soccer player, you can’t win a championship by only playing defense. You might not lose badly, but you’ll never score enough to win.
The same principle applies to your financial life.
Defense is crucial and budgeting is defense. Tracking your expenses is defense. Building an emergency fund is defense. Avoiding stupid debt is defense.
These practices protect you from chaos, from emergencies that would otherwise derail your entire life, and from the constant anxiety of living paycheck to paycheck.
But here’s what most financial advice misses
→ you can’t build wealth by playing defense alone.
Defense keeps you safe. Offense gives you freedom.
Offense means creating value: producing something, building something, owning something, or investing in something. Offense is what actually moves the needle with net worth.
It’s the difference between protecting what you have and actively building more.
Most people spend their entire careers playing pure defense trying not to lose. Avoiding debt, cutting expenses, and maximizing their 401k match, but then wonder why they never feel like they’re getting ahead.
The answer is simple → they’re playing not to lose instead of playing to win.
You need both. Strong defense gives you stability and breathing room. Smart offense gives you growth and eventual freedom from trading your time for money.
Ownership is Different for Everyone: Hunter vs Farmer
When people hear “ownership” or go out and “build something,” they often imagine the same thing. Starting a traditional business with employees, payroll, office space, and all the headaches and stress that comes with it. No thanks…
For most people, that vision is either terrifying or completely unappealing. And that’s okay, because that’s not the only path!
Not everyone is wired to be a hunter, including myself. Always chasing the next sale, thriving on the adrenaline of uncertainty, and comfortable with feast-or-famine cycles.
Some people are farmers. They thrive by cultivating something steadily over time, by building systems that produce consistently, and by nurturing growth rather than constantly pursuing a conquest.
And the great thing about the modern internet economy is ownership can take countless forms that don’t require you to become a traditional business owner.
No employees to manage, no unnecessary overhead, and no driving to the office!
Ownership can mean a lot of things and here are some examples:
Being a solopreneur who creates digital products that sell while you sleep.
Building an audience around your expertise and monetizing the attention through consulting, coaching, or paid content.
Negotiating equity or profit-sharing arrangements in your current role.
Developing a specialized skill that you can sell at premium rates on your terms.
The key characteristic of ownership isn’t complexity or scale. It’s that you own something that produces value beyond your blood, sweat, and tears worked.
You create something once that can be sold or leveraged multiple times.
You build something that compounds, growing larger and more valuable over time without requiring more effort from you.
And you don’t have to build an empire to step off the treadmill. You don’t need to become the next tech billionaire or launch the next unicorn startup.
You just need to own something that produces value beyond the hours you work to create it.
That’s the real escape route from the rat race and where true happiness can be found!
Steps You Can Take Right Now
This isn’t about overhauling your entire life in a single weekend. Trust me, I’ve tried and it doesn’t work…It’s about taking concrete steps, one at a time, in a direction that actually leads somewhere different.
First, define your standards.
Right now, before you do anything else, write down 1-3 wealth standards. Make them “I am” or “I don’t” statements, not “I want to” or “I’m trying to” or “someday I’ll”.
Those are goals dressed up as standards and we aren’t doing that.
Real standards are declarations of your current identity.
These become your non-negotiables. The boundaries that define who you are.
To help get the ball rolling for you, here are the previous examples of standards:
I save 10% of my earnings automatically.
I provide value wherever I work and am paid a premium.
I don’t carry credit card balances and pay them in full every month.
Second, build your defense.
Honestly, you need to face your numbers. All of them. The sooner you face them, the sooner you take control.
Create a real budget. Not a vague idea of where your money goes, but a detailed accounting of every dollar. Know exactly what you earn and what you spend. Creating a budget can be both nauseating and enlightening and I’d be happy to work with you if you feel like you might throw up.
Put away a 1K as quickly as possible to battle against anything minor that pops up. Then think and plan about building an emergency fund that covers 3-6 months of your expenses. This isn’t optional or a “nice to have”, this is the foundation that everything else is built on.
Yes, this part is super boring. It will feel slow, and it requires discipline but you do it anyway. You can’t play offense effectively while you’re constantly scrambling to cover defense.
Third, start exploring offense.
Ask yourself: How can I create or own something that compounds over time?
This doesn’t mean you need to have the answer today or launch something tomorrow. It means you start thinking differently about your relationship with value creation.
Could you create a digital product related to your expertise?
Could you build a consulting practice on the side?
Could you negotiate an equity stake in your current work?
Could you develop a skill that commands premium rates?
Could you build an audience around knowledge you already have?
Start small, test ideas and learn by doing.
The goal isn’t perfection or overnight success. The goal is moving from time-for-money exchange toward creating and owning assets that can produce value independently of your time.
Finally, understand your wiring.
Are you more of a hunter or a farmer? Do you thrive on high-stakes sales and variable income, or do you prefer steady cultivation and predictable systems?
Neither is better, they’re just different.
And trying to force yourself into the wrong model will make you miserable and unsuccessful.
Hunters thrive building service businesses, doing high-ticket sales, or pursuing commission-based opportunities.
Farmers excel at creating evergreen digital products, building subscription-based offerings, or developing long-term client relationships.
Know your wiring so there is no time wasted chasing something that doesn’t align with you because you think that is the right answer.
Know yourself. Align your path with your actual personality, not with what you think success is supposed to look like.
You’re Not Alone
The rat race and the exhaustion you feel is real.
The frustration of working harder without getting ahead is tiring. You’re not imagining it, and you’re not failing. You’re just in a rut and need to refocus.
I’ve walked the same path you’re on. From carrying debt and chasing raises that never quite solve the problem, to building wealth standards that compound in money, health, and in life satisfaction.
The shift isn’t magic, and it wasn’t instant, but it was real and absolutely possible.
Your situation isn’t hopeless and you don’t have to fix everything all at once. You just need a different way forward and a framework that works with you instead of keeping you stuck in the same patterns.
And if you want someone to walk that road with you, someone who understands both the CFO perspective of building business wealth and getting your own financial house in order, that’s where I can help.
Alongside my work as a CFO advising businesses, I’m also a Certified Dave Ramsey Financial Coach. I’m trained to guide people out of debt, into financial peace, and toward wealth-building strategies that work in the real world, not just in theory.
If you’re ready to step off the treadmill and start building a financial life that compounds over time instead of consuming everything you earn, let’s talk.
👉 Work with me 1:1 Coaching – Book a Call - Email: info@elevatingmoney.com or leave a comment below.
P.S. Most people will read this and nod their head in agreement. Maybe even feel a spark of inspriation and then go right back to running harder on the same treadmill.
They tell themselves they’ll start next month, or after the holidays, or when things settle down at work.
Don’t be most people.
Even one coaching conversation can help you see the exit ramp you’ve been running past for years. The question isn’t whether change is possible. The question is whether you’re willing to take the first step toward it.